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Dodie's Dream World - Complete Chaos! xxx
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Tue, 14 Feb 2012
I do love this little story, makes me laugh ever time I read it. xxx


        "Well my dear," she said as she bent over my twisted torso. "It looks to me as if you have got yourself into a right old pickle, doesn't it?"

        I opened my mouth to talk but she either didn't make sense of my mumbled words of pain or was too deep in thought as she looked this way and that along the empty platform.
      "Hm, it does seem like we're on our own my lovely, so we better decide which is the best way to go about it.  I just can't understand how you managed to do this all by yourself!"
       "It wasn't easy! " I answered and managed a small smile, or was it a grimace, could have been either.
      "My mother always told me I could never do anything by half."

"I do believe she might have been right my dear , now let me see." she frowned, "hmm  that arm doesn't seem very sure of itself.  I think that shoulder bag will have to come off."
With that my rescuer turned round and picked what could be described as a Mary Poppins bag on the bench, obviously huge and very full, and therefore heavy, I smiled at her comely face. The next second she was inside the bag rumaging until she came out with..... no not a hat stand, this looked rather more like a huge pair of crimping shears, why you youngsters carry such heavy bags is beyond me." she looked at my face before continuing, "now
no need to worry my dear, these have been used many times before, and never let me down."
I closed my eyes "I wonder where?"
I thought,
      "Now hold on to what you can, this might jolt a little when the arm drops, but the pain will soon go!

      I buried my chin deeper into my chest  as the strap was cut and the arm secumbed to the force of gravity and joined my shoulder again.
  It was a good job that my sounds were suppressed,  for the words that I
uttered into the bosoms were certainly not related to Brahms Lullabye.
      "There you go" she said moving the arm a little as she walked to the front again, there was a  slight click and she was right the pain did stop.
        "Now before we go on, my name is Margaret May, though my girlies do
tend to call me Aunty May," I smiled, somehow I imagined her as an aunt, though the name Margaret Rutherford did spring to mind.
        I made to move my leg and only succeeded in sending a seering p
ain up my left side.
"Now now child, don't be hasty, nothing ever comes of being hasty."

       "Oh my goodness" I grinned to myself, now I was a bloody hobbit being chastised by treebeard,
I laughed again at my own thoughts, she smiled and nodded her head. Her little bonnet hat danced on her forhead.
       She left me again and wondered to the far end of the bench,
"I don't suppose this varmint will move." She said as she put her weight against it, but not even a shudder emitted.
"Nope, I didn't really think it would, when they were put here in the forties, they were put here to stay, out live the lot of us, and that's for sure;"
She went quiet, 
"a-! ha, I see now!"

Quietness, then
the soft clinking sound of metal against metal, and a thud, as whatever was being undone was dropped to the floor. I just lay there, there was nothing really I could do but let her get on with it.
        "Will you just look at that, the stupid
beggers have put the scaffolding through the bench cos they couldn't move it."
I tried to raise myself up to look but it wasn't to be; As I moved up one way, my legs ends moved the other. I let out a little squeal.
"There, there, soon be over pet,"  she said with a big smile on her face. "Now I know were not delivering of a baby, but I think this might be a good time for you to pant; I want to make your legs and bottom a unit again  for they do seem to be a little wayward."
    She sighed, and sighed again. "Now do take my advice and try to take some nice deep breaths, for it will hurt a bit, but without everything following everything else so to speak,  we won't get you out."

She tutted, then looking over my shoulder she added. "But whatever you do my dear don't try to stand up or you'll be down there on the underpass.
I gulped, and immediately wanted to look.
"Now, now you stay nice and still. "
Then without another word her big hands were addressing both my legs and I was reunited, as she called it.
"Keep still, keep still ....... don't wriggle and don't lean back or you'll have us both down there..... she wrapped her arms under my armpits and across my chest, a quick flip and I was stomach down , head on seat over the back of the bench.
"Hold tight to the sides that's a good girl."
I did what she said without a word, she came to the front and stood there with a smile on her facce.
"I always say; weigh up the situation before diving in and I think I have  delivered enough babies to know the best way to get the rabbit out of the hole."
       She began to laugh, chuckling to herself as she came to help me with the rest of my deliverance. It was all over in a flash; she picked me bodily from the bench, turning me round and about, I think there might have been an upside down in there somewhere, but next minute I was back on the seat, the way I had started before my hat had been knocked off by a wayward piece of scaffold. I sat there exhausted but relieved.
Going round the bench again, Auntie May Rutherford collected my bag and the piece of strap she had cut, she also picked up a pretty blue beret.
"I don't suppose this belongs to you, my dear." she said holding it up in the air. " It goes well with the mitts your wearing."
She looked at me and grinned. "I suppose this is the reason for your little entanglement with the bench and the scaffolding ?"
I nodded sheepishly, but she carried on without waiting for the reason.
"It was a very stupid thing to do, putting scaffolding around a hole, even if it does reach from the floor below.  Never mind you're safe and sound now and I guess, " she glanced at her watch, "Goodness me I shall be late home"
A huge smile crossed her face. "Well my dearie, I must be off home now. I'm expecting a couple of my young girls to shed there babes tomorrow, daresn't be late getting up."
And without another word she  nodded her head and turning towards the exit  she was gone.
        Me, well I sat there for at least ten minutes; beret in one hand, broken strap in the other. I felt extremely dirty and smelt like a greasy frying pan. Walking down the steps to the underpass, I stopped at the bottom of the  scaffolding. I smiled to myself.
"Yes, it is rather a long way up." I said to the empty space.
I continued to smile all the way to the hospital, I wondered if Margaret May would ever come to the Queen Elizabeth. It would be nice to see her again.

The idea for this short story was thought up during my Writing Group, we had to express a few different emotions, not quite sure what mine were now.
I think it's turned out pretty well, I hope you like it!

Seligor. 2012
Posted 09:32

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